chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
