the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize