4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
