How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize