He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
