is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
