her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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