1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
