He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize