Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
