I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
