She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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