Pregnant stripper...not hot.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize