have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Found the puke drawer
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
