Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
