Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
