the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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