Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
