Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize