Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
