I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
