Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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