it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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