if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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