Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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