he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
