wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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