To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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