did you get engaged???
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
