she looked like the before picture.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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