erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
