The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
