His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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