my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
