She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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