people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize