But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
