i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
