i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
