he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
