is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
