the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
