I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
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