ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
