Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize