I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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