do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
