You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
