no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize