How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize