I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
